The comparison one is killer! I have gotten better at managing social media for the most part but every once in a while I'll be like, man why do I feel so depressed all the sudden? And it's like, oh, because I just spent an hour unnecessarily scrolling lol.
When my husband and I went out for our anniversary a few weeks ago, I had this "Do I really need to share this?" moment. It was like a switch had flipped. I took pictures of our fancy desert and then selfies while we were playing pinball at a place downtown to celebrate 22 years of marriage and I finally said, "I don't own anyone anything." People didn't care, nor did they need to know, how we celebrated over two decades of marriage. We (collective we) were trained to share everything for years (remember when we checked in everywhere we went???) and now we need to give ourselves permission to pick and choose what we share and who we share it with.
I am liberally blocking and muting and now deleting as many bots from my IG as I can find. I'm unfollowing "friends" who unfollowed me ages ago without my knowledge. I want my feed to be about me as a writer and traveler, period. The more private details of my life will come out in my blog (here on Substack) where people have decided that they want to commit to the journey.
Finally, I'm working on not comparing myself to other others and trying to embrace each moment and learn from people who are more successful (in terms of books sold) than me.
It was such a huge shift in my life when I realized that I don't have to be on social media. That it wasn't really affecting my book sales at all. I was miserable because of how much time I was spending on there and how much it took over my brain, and how much writing I wasn't getting done.
Thanks for saying this! I'm wondering, however, if it's possible to follow your advice if I'm looking to get trad published. If the expectation is that I'm going to promote myself on social media, I can't do that without using it. Aren't I going to be shooting myself in the foot in terms of finding representation if I decide to quit them all?
Amen to all of this! Thank you for these timely reminders.
The comparison one is killer! I have gotten better at managing social media for the most part but every once in a while I'll be like, man why do I feel so depressed all the sudden? And it's like, oh, because I just spent an hour unnecessarily scrolling lol.
Such great points, Jodi. I’m really reevaluating how I use social media this year. I don’t just want to add to the endless noise.
I love your yarn and cat pics!
Oh my goodness. Yes to so much of this.
When my husband and I went out for our anniversary a few weeks ago, I had this "Do I really need to share this?" moment. It was like a switch had flipped. I took pictures of our fancy desert and then selfies while we were playing pinball at a place downtown to celebrate 22 years of marriage and I finally said, "I don't own anyone anything." People didn't care, nor did they need to know, how we celebrated over two decades of marriage. We (collective we) were trained to share everything for years (remember when we checked in everywhere we went???) and now we need to give ourselves permission to pick and choose what we share and who we share it with.
I am liberally blocking and muting and now deleting as many bots from my IG as I can find. I'm unfollowing "friends" who unfollowed me ages ago without my knowledge. I want my feed to be about me as a writer and traveler, period. The more private details of my life will come out in my blog (here on Substack) where people have decided that they want to commit to the journey.
Finally, I'm working on not comparing myself to other others and trying to embrace each moment and learn from people who are more successful (in terms of books sold) than me.
No one has to do this. Publishers who specify it should be avoided.
Thank you so much for this. I really needed it!
It was such a huge shift in my life when I realized that I don't have to be on social media. That it wasn't really affecting my book sales at all. I was miserable because of how much time I was spending on there and how much it took over my brain, and how much writing I wasn't getting done.
Thanks for saying this! I'm wondering, however, if it's possible to follow your advice if I'm looking to get trad published. If the expectation is that I'm going to promote myself on social media, I can't do that without using it. Aren't I going to be shooting myself in the foot in terms of finding representation if I decide to quit them all?