How to edit your own book (part two)
Part Two of very long guide to making your book extra super awesome
Welcome back to my very long letter about how to edit your own book! This is part two. If you need to read part one, it’s right here — and I definitely recommend you do that before diving into this section. We cover a lot in that part!
Part two: mid-level, line edits, copyedits, and proofreading (that’s this one!)
All right, we’ve written, we’ve deleted, we’ve rearranged, we’ve toiled over this book. It all seemed like such a good idea when we sat down to do it.
Yet, there’s still more. More ways for the book to improve, become stronger, be more meaningful to the reader. There are more ways to get your original, sparkling vision for the story onto the page and ready for the next stage in its life.
So it’s time to continue our top-down approach and work on . . .
2. Mid-level edits
Once you feel confident in the overall shape and structure of the story, it’s time to focus on the flow from one scene to another, keep the character arcs arcing, and take a good look at the pacing.
Here are a few things to keep an eye out for:
A. Repeated information
Sometimes when we’re writing, we repeat information — backstory, worldbuilding, something the character learns during the story . . . whatever. This is usually because we, the author, are cementing those things in our heads while we write. Get it all on the page. Make it feel real.
But it probably doesn’t need to be on the page every time. So trim out the less interesting instances.
If you’re worried your reader won’t remember something, that might indicate you need to reveal it in a more memorable way!
Or, if it’s a small detail you don’t actually need them to remember but you want them to understand in the moment, consider varying the way you remind the reader. For example, in Nightrender, I had a lot of gods — a few main ones I expected reader to remember, but also some for, like, trees or rocks or whatever. So when I brought those up, it usually went like “She prayed to Blah blah. But if the god of rocks was listening, they didn’t respond.”
B. Info-dumping/exposition
This ends often ends up on the page for the same reason — the author is telling themself the story, so it needs to be there . . . in the first draft. But not after that.
I’m talking paragraphs that completely stop the action of the story, stuff that might not even make sense where it is. Characters weirdly monologuing about their lives.
Now that you’re in the second (or fifth or seventeenth) draft, trim that stuff out. Keep the good parts — the things the character and readers actually need to know. If there are cool details you love and want to include, find a subtler place to slip them in. (Remember the egg example from the previous letter?)
C. Circular thoughts/actions/beats
This is another one a lot of authors do — and it’s part of the same getting-the-story-on-the-page thing. So if you find that you do this, don’t worry; you’re in good company.
But what I’m talking about is usually a scene-level thing. For example, your character thinking about what they’re going to do it, and then doing it. But we don’t need to see them thinking about doing it unless something goes wrong.
This is also where your character has a revelation, thinks about a tangent, and then circles back around to the initial thought. (This one gets me sooo often.)
Trim out the less interesting part. I promise, it will make the one you keep so much stronger and more meaningful to the reader.
D. Scenes that need to be cut or combined
Sometimes you’ll find you have two scenes (often in a row, or very close together!) that do the same thing. They give the main character the same kind of information, point them in the same direction, or maybe . . . they’re not really doing much at all.
Look for ways to combine moments that serve the same purpose. This will help make them stronger/more memorable for the reader, and also keep the story moving along at a good pace.
E. Pace
Speaking of pace, it’s a good idea to start looking for places things are too fast . . . or too slow. Make sure you’re giving your characters a chance to show off how cool they are — and also have emotional reactions to what just happened.
Look for lots of action scenes in a row — especially where the stakes don’t change or evolve — or a lot of talky scenes, where your character is going about meeting different people and, again, the stakes don’t change or evolve.
F. Reader experience
And while I work on this at every stage — from my first draft to my final — this is also where I take a hard look at what I want the reader’s experience to be. I put myself in their shoes and come at the story as if I don’t know what’s about to happen.
I think about what the reader knows or doesn’t know upfront, how information is revealed to them, whether the characters feel like real people, what parts might be kind of boring, whether they might feel grounded in the scene or kind of . . . disassociated from the moment. What are their expectations? How am I meeting those or subverting them?
Obviously, I can’t see the story from every reader’s perspective (this is why it’s a good idea to have beta readers, critique partners, and editors!), but it’s a good start.
3. Line edits
Oh my gosh, we’re getting there. We’re on at least the third draft now, but probably the fifth or sixth. And it’s finally time to look at this thing on a line level.
Now that we’ve got the book in the correct shape and smoothed out the biggest rough spots in the story, we can focus on making the writing sparkle. Here are some thoughts I like to carry with me on this pass:
Am I using seventeen words when five would do?
Does the dialogue feel natural?
And is it meaningful? We love banter, but is it going on too long?
Do the sentences flow into one another and have a good rhythm?
If every sentence starts with “I” or “She,” that’s probably going to read awkwardly.
If all the sentences are the same structure or length, that might read awkwardly, too.
Are there lots of big paragraphs in a row? Or one-line paragraphs in a row? Does this make sense for the moment?
Is anything confusing? Is there weird phrasing?
Sometimes I’m trying to be clever, but it turns out I’m just confusing.
Keep an eye out for cliched writing and overused phrases.
Cliches are classic for a reason, but if everyone is letting out the breath they didn’t know they were holding, is anyone actually breathing?
Take this opportunity to look for your crutch words and phrases and challenge yourself to make it more interesting.
This is also where you’ll want to take an extra close look at voice, regardless whether the story is in first, third, or even second person. Make sure the voice is consistent throughout — and from character to character. Look at dialogue here, too.
4. Copyedits
Are you tired of your book yet? I hope not! Because we get to read it . . . again!
When you’re going through the publishing process, you’ll have an external copyeditor work on this part for you. But since we’re looking at how to edit our own book, here are a few things to look out for while you’re doing this pass:
Inconsistencies
Does someone’s shirt color changes from scene a to scene b?
Are conflicting details given to the character?
Is it a bitterly cold . . . summer afternoon?
Timeline
Does time flow in a realistic manner? Or do fifty hours worth of actions happen in five?
If there are dates in the story, do those line up correctly?
If character a is supposed to do something before character b responds . . . are they actually doing it first?
Word choice
Is that the correct word? Double check it.
Seriously, assume you know nothing about words anymore.
Echoes/word repetition
If you use the same word or phrase a few times on the same page, it’s probably time to choose a different one, cut, or rewrite to make the repetition less obvious.
Some words stick out because they’re unusual for the audience. Think about, uh, the word “cacophonous.” It’s a cool word. But it sticks out. If you use it a bunch, the reader is going to get stuck on it. So choose your favorite and maybe find a different word for the other fifty instances.
Grammar and punctuation
Use the right their/they’re/there, get your comma splices fixed, and get those subjects and verbs in agreement.
Once again, assume you know nothing about the language.
Double check it.
Fact checking
Dig into those details to make sure you’re correct! For example, if you say a fabric is woven, but later say it’s knitted, I’m going to side-eye you hard because those aren’t the same thing.
Assume you don’t know anything about anything.
Typos
When you have an outside copyeditor, they might give you a style sheet. That usually includes the timeline, spelling and capitalization preference, character descriptions — stuff like that. If you’re a big nerd, that might be fun for you to make, too.
Understand, your self confidence might take a beating during this phase. That’s normal. Scrape whatever is left of it off the floor, because there’s another round of edits to go. Your book needs you!
5. Proofreading
In traditional publishing, we usually do this during first pass pages. (Sometimes there are second or third pass pages too.) I’ve talked about those before here.
Basically, this is the last look at the book before it takes its next step. Whether you’re about to query or hit the publish button, it’s worth taking one more look at the book for typos or anything else that might throw the reader out of the story.
Look, all books have typos. We’re human! And readers are often pretty forgiving about a few scattered over the course of 80,000 - 120,000 words. But if there are a ton of typos and errors, it interrupts their experience and makes it more difficult to enjoy the story.
Do one last pass for your reader.
Remember your readers
This is more of an all-over note, one I hope you’ll consider during every part of the editing and revision process.
Who’s your audience? What are their expectations? Are you being respectful to them and their experience levels? Are you meeting them where they are? Are you challenging them? Are you rewarding them?
Reread your book with your reader in mind. (This is easiest when you have some distance from it!) How is someone who’s completely new to the story going to engage with it?
I definitely think we need to write our books for ourselves, first. But if you want other people to enjoy your book, too, it’s important to keep them in mind while we’re editing. Remember, many of us aren’t just asking readers to pay money for our stories — we’re asking them to spend hours with us. Time and money. We need to make it worth it.
Write for yourself. Edit for your reader.
Okay, we’re almost finished!
I know this is a LOT. Like, a lot a lot.
This is hard work that will probably make your brain feel soft and squishy more than once. Welcome to the club. I actually think most of us will find we spend more time editing than we do drafting.
But there’s good news: you’ll internalize a lot of the lessons you learn from editing your work like this. Your next first draft won’t be perfect (it never will be, I’m so sorry), but you’ll probably spot weaknesses while you’re drafting and be able to fix them quickly, rather than devote a whole round of major edits to the problem.
And if all this seems like too much, that’s okay. That’s normal. Take a break if you need one, and get back to work when you’re feeling ready.
Something I think you’ll hear a lot of authors say . . . you actually learn a lot by doing a critique for someone else’s book. Find a critique partner. Trade manuscripts and use this guide (or one you like better) to write an edit letter for them. You can do multiple rounds and levels (one at a time, probably) if you’re a huge overachiever.
When you come back to your own book, you’ll be primed to look at it with a more critical eye. You’ll see where you can make your book stronger, now that you’ve articulated it for someone else!
I truly think that one of the best things I did early on, when I was just learning how to string a sentence together, was do critiques for other writers. A lot of them returned the favor, and I’ll be forever grateful for their time and attention! But learning how to articulate my problems with someone else’s work — and what I thought they did well! — taught me so much about improving my own work.
Okay, that’s it. We made it.
Now remember: you’ve got this.
A few related letters:
Advice for starting a critique group
Button things!
Once again, I’d like to thank Beth Revis, Susan Dennard, Tanaz Bhathena, and Erin Bowman for reading these letters in advance.
Beth has a newsletter and patreon.
Susan has a newsletter and writing academy; here’s her free revision guide.
Tanaz has two books on Kindle Unlimited right now, and I really love these! Hunted by the Sky and Rising Like a Storm.
Erin has a newsletter and a plotting workshop.
Thank you, friends!
Also thanks to my paid subscribers.1 These letters took days for me to write and edit. Without you, it would have been a lot harder for me to justify the time I spent on them.
If you’re still reading this, a few of my books are on Kindle Unlimited right now: Incarnate, Asunder, Infinite (the whole trilogy!), Before She Ignites, As She Ascends, My Lady Jane, My Plain Jane, My Calamity Jane
Meanwhile, My Salty Mary (50% off hardcover at BN) has a steeply discounted ebook: Barnes and Noble, Amazon; as does The Orphan Queen: Barnes and Noble, Amazon
And it’s not on sale, but Hildy thinks you should read it. Bye Forever, I Guess: One More Page, Parentheses Books, Bookshop, Barnes and Noble, Amazon
Incredibly helpful and so well written! Thank you for devoting your time to this, Jodi! The advice really helps and unites us writers who are all facing the same daunting task of self-editing!
This is gold! Thank you for writing these letters.